I don't understand

This is a direct quote from at least four of my students this week:
"Those vocabulary words you gave us...where do we find the definitions?"

You know our education system is failing when 17-year-olds do not know where to find a definition. What's that sound? It must be Noah Webster rolling over in his grave. When I told students to find the definition on their own, the highest grade in ALL SIX ENGLISH CLASSES was 8/15. When I provided the exact definitions I would test them on (in the form of a MATCHING TEST), the grades were a little better, but I still had about 50% of the students with an F. Seriously? How difficult can it be to remember fifteen words?

Things aren't going much better in the attitude department. I actually had a student stand right outside my open classroom door and discuss how much she hated me and my class. So that afternoon I called the mom. She was at least kinder than the daughter, but when I said I was trying to engage her daughter in English, she said, "good luck with that." First of all, the phone call itself was an enormous step for me. I have anxiety attacks about calling parents. I am so afraid of parents that I prepare for the parent/teacher conferences about a month in advance. I pray for as few parents as possible. Maybe it's because my own mother actually took me out of school in 6th grade because I wasn't chosen as an usher for the middle school graduation. She was down at the school for many days debating the complete lack of justice in the selection process for ushering. USHERING. Now that I think about it, this may also be why I have an intense fear of graduation ceremonies.